Day jobs are a lot like lovers.

In the beginning, there’s the wooing, the passion, the thrill of something new.

As time passes in a not-right working relationship, passion gets replaced with just making it through another day. You’re paying for parking instead of the other way around. The bathroom isn’t even close to your standards of cleanliness. All the first-day excitement gets replaced with routine and sneaking around on Facebook.

You’re secretly wondering … Is this it?

The last day at my job felt a lot like a break-up. There was that nagging feeling of regret. Yes, I would miss it, but at the same time, felt I was better off. There were awkward goodbyes and a box for my personal belongings. “It’s not you, it’s me …”

Finally, I drove away, remembering the good times, the bad. I was reflective and a little sad.

For about 3 hours.

Then a lovely glimpse of my new reality began to settle in. Gone were the Monday morning meetings, hectic commutes and Fridays aching for the clock to reach 5. I’m getting a taste of freedom and loving it.

Secretly tempted for a taste yourself?

Here’s how to start breaking up with your day job:

Convince your significant other that it’s a good idea. Unless you’re working for free, giving up a major chunk of your family wealth is not always met with enthusiasm. I showed Mr. Right how quitting could benefit the whole family. There would be someone at home to manage the household, keep up with the laundry and be there for the kids. I could take over some chores we used to share so we could both live a simpler life. All along, I can write and pursue my dreams. If quitting will equal  moving to a smaller house and slashing the family budget, you’ll need 100% support. Prepare to argue the pros and cons.

Get a lover on the side. If you still need to make money after the break up, start a passion project on the side. While I wanted to quit my day job, I didn’t want to quit my career. So I started this blog in October 2009. It was a good way to get my feet wet with something other than the 8 to 5. Think of something you really love to do and start to make money (on the side) doing it. Or at the very least, start building a foundation to make money down the road. Read the adult guide to finding what you want to be when you grow up for ideas.

Make time. Now that you have a new passion on the side, make time for it. Here are some places to find extra time while working a full-time job:

• Early in the morning.
• Lunch break.
• After work (or dinner or bedtime – whatever works in your home).
• Quit watching TV.
• Weekends.
• Vacation, sick or personal days.

Get finances in order. Go on a budget, pay off debt, track spending and quit shopping. Stash some money in savings. Read these articles for help:

• Read frugal living archives at Wise Bread.
• Get out of debt with the debt snowball.
• 20 little ways to save a lot of money.

Pick a date. Bookmark it at work using this countdown clock. Check it often for a really big dose of motivation.

Speaking of motivation – You’ll need it. Anything worth having is worth working for, and this break up is no different. It takes a lot of determination, planning and patience. Something that always helped me was reviewing my motivators. Why was I waking up to blog before sunrise? Why was I staying home instead of enjoying an expensive night out with friends?

These are the questions to answer, then answer again.

As the reasons become clear,  so does the path.

If my writing helps or inspires you, please share it with other people. This is the number one way you can support my writing.

xoxo Melissa

Photo by shoothead