There’s nothing new under the sun when it comes to having a good morning.

Somehow, after nearly 29 years of living, I still haven’t learned. My mornings are rushed, chaotic and sleep-deprived – the complete opposite of what I stand for. I can shower in 4.5 minutes, shave my legs in two and apply makeup in six.

That’s not exactly something I’m proud of.

So here’s my challenge – follow a 10-10-10 routine to a better morning. I’m committed these three steps for the next week. After, I’ll post my thoughts.

So cheers to life. Cheers to letting love follow you out the door. To ending the chaos. Na zdrowie!

10 minutes in the morning. Wake and reflect on life. Think about what the day will hold – good and bad. If you could, what would you change? Snuggle something in the process. Pray, meditate, repeat a compassion ritual. Think about love gently awakening your day.

10 minutes more. Wake 10 minutes earlier to avoid the rush. Take a 6 minute shower. Shave your legs, stop mid stroke and admire them. Not bad, not bad at all.

10 minutes at night. Just before bed, put everything in its place. Dry the last dish, throw out the recycling, lock down, schmoosh the garbage a little lower. Give tomorrow a head start.

How about you? Are your mornings chaotic or loving? Are you ready to let love follow you out the door?

Photo by schani

I’m proud to announce yours truly was chosen as a monthly columnist on Corey’s awesome blog: Simple Marriage.

His idea – “A better marriage by keeping it simple” – fits the way I think.

It would be amazing if you could leave a comment on his blog supporting me… Just sayin’. I’d love it.

You can read about all the columnists here.

Also – here are a few posts to enjoy:

Man Up/Woman Up: How To Have Curl Your Toes Sex

How To Improve Marriage And Slow Down Life At The Same Time

14 Ways to Ruin Sex, For You and Your Spouse

Photo by Mike Peters

Do you live in California?

Well, I don’t. And here in Wisconsin, winter started by dumping 14.5 inches of snow and made itself nice and comfy with daytime temps of zero degrees or lower.

For as freezing as it is for as long as it is, you’d think we’d have this winter business down. People would be crossing the street in snowsuits and ski masks. But that isn’t the case. On a good day, you might spot a reliable pair of boots. Asking the kids to put on a hat is like suggesting they jump in a snowbank face first.

This winter, choose warmth over fashion – or better yet, combine the two. Here are some trends I’ve warmed up to:

Snowboard pants. A much cooler look than the $20 dollar pair of poofy snow-suspenders, these pants are easy to move in and even come in patterns. I’ll warn you: they’re easy on the eye, but not on the budget, so choose wisely. These are a great neutral and also come in a pattern.

Cotton/wool blend socks. I am done with polyester socks. When my feet are freezing, I always know why. Read labels and test the ankle band while you’re at it – too tight and you’ll be cutting off circulation (another sock pet peeve of mine). We don’t need help with that in the winter.

Find and wear an adorable hat. I love my winter hat so much I almost can’t wait for winter to arrive. It’s from a pricey little boutique but worth every penny. (That’s me wearing it above – and here’s where you can find one.)

How do you stay warm in the winter? What are your favorite products and brands?

My Little Sister makes me feel old.

When I’m with her, I realize the days of choosing friends over family are long gone. I’ve exchanged my leisurely hour “getting ready” for a chaotic 30 minutes.

This weekend, as I stared in wonder at her trendy clothes and perfectly straightened hair, I wondered: what can I learn?

Because yes – Little Sister can be a bit of a know-it-all about things she knows not at all.

But before I rolled my eyes, I let her fix my eye shadow. And my hair, twice.

Just wait until you’re older.

You’ll understand someday.

I learned: there is a time to choose fun over responsibility.

Also, a time to have school, work and clinicals.

A time to rethink your style and learn.

A time to feel young again.

Women feel a lot of pressure to be good at everything – I know I do. On any given day you can find me trying to be a good mom and wife, good housekeeper, good person, good organizer, good listener, good communicator – the list goes on. All of these personal development projects keep piling up on my plate until I feel stuffed to the point of bursting.

So what’s the solution? When your plate is already full, how to do you add a side project? If your goal is to eat healthier, do you give up if you’re already struggling to get another frozen pizza in the oven?

That’s why I decided to feature tiny projects – Little steps you can take toward a big goal, like losing weight, eliminating stress or just being better at something. If you have an overwhelming or annoying problem you’d like me to address, leave a comment and I’ll feature it in an upcoming post.

Here’s to a future filled with tiny victories.

See also:

Tiny Project: Don’t Eat It

Tiny Project: Remember to Switch the Laundry

“I can’t go out – I have to clean all day.”

“Mom is here helping me clean.”

“I spent the whole weekend cleaning.”

If you’ve ever said or heard one of these statements, I’m feeling annoyed with you.

Sure, cleaning sucks. But when I hear my friends and family missing entire weekends of their life, I feel baffled. Cleaning has never – and should never – take this long.

So if you’re planning to spend the weekend cleaning: stop right there and put your hands up. You can do it in one hour, and I can prove it.

Here are all the tips and tricks you’ll ever need to clean a modest home (about 1,000 square feet and one bathroom for my first floor – I don’t clean the lower level as often since its not as used.)

To begin:

- Make sure you have the right tools in an easy-to-carry caddy.

• All-purpose cleaner (I prefer equal parts white vinegar and water)
• Toilet bowl cleaner
• Toilet bowl brush
• Windex
• Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soap
• Mr. Clean Magic Erasers
• Swiffer dusters (with the long handle attachment)
• Cleaning cloths (microfiber = good) or old t-shirts
• Paper towel (for mirrors)

- If you normally let clutter build up until you can’t stand it, its time to change. Try spending 10 to 15 minutes putting things where they belong everyday.

- If you haven’t adopted a clutter control habit yet, you’ll need to tack on some extra time to do a clutter-sweep – focus only on clutter and get it picked up quickly. TIP: Have a donation bin and garbage handy for this!

Melissa’s 1-Hour Cleaning Method

This is a combination of tips from Real Simple, Apartment Therapy and Leo Babauta… all mixed into one foolproof cleaning routine.

1. Dust. Many of my cleaning products are Earth-friendly, but I can’t live without Swiffer dusters. They almost make dusting enjoyable. Work from top down, left to right around the rooms until every room is done. If you have wood floors, sneak under the furniture, including the bed. Don’t spend tons of time dusting – the key is to do a “good enough” job. (Perfect is the enemy of good.)

2. Shake rugs, throw pillows and blankets. These items trap tons of dust and dirt – a weekly shake will keep your home much cleaner.

3. Wipe down counters, furniture, fronts of cupboards and appliances. Since you’ll be vacuuming, feel free to swipe right onto the floor! I fill the bathroom sink with warm water and a few drops of Dr. Bronner’s Magic Soap. Since I have a dog that drools on my leather furniture, I have to wipe it down each week. If you don’t, you can mostly skip this step, or do a “good enough” job. Move quickly around the rooms. Switch it up week to week –  wipe inside the microwave one week, the fridge, next week.

4. Spray cleaner on bathroom sink, toilet and shower, then squirt cleaner into toilet bowl. If there is a lot of grime (i.e. you haven’t been cleaning once per week), let the cleaner do some of the work for you – come back in 5 minutes and spray a second time before continuing. Starting at the sink, wipe each surface. When you get to the shower, wipe off soap scum with the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. Scrub toilet bowl. Finally, clean the mirror.

5. Empty garbages.

6. Vaccum. Don’t worry about being perfect – you can get spots you miss next week. A “good enough” vacuum job is all that’s needed.

7. Mop as needed. Again, don’t worry about being perfect – if you’re out of time, spot clean the “bad” areas instead.

8. Replace rugs.

I’d love to know what you think of my routine. Give it a try and leave a comment!

photo by canonsnapper

I’m a big fan of washing a load of laundry in the morning and switching it to the dryer before bed.

The problem I have is forgetting about it – and discovering a hard, musty lump of wet clothes a few days later.

Now, I put a plastic hanger over my doorknob which signals: Laundry in progress.

Its a blue hanger, to be specific. Problem solved.

Do you have a Tiny Project I can share with readers? If so, email me at melissa {at} peaceandprojects {dot} com. (Thwarting spammers with that email address, so bear with me.)

Photo by McMorr

photo by donricardopezzano

Time rules my life.

I didn’t realize until recently just how much it ruled me. Apparently on the primary colors personality wheel – I’m a purple. And purples have a thing about time. Specifically, we’re at war with it. Which is why I constantly feel the pressure of time – from the moment I hear my alarm’s buzzer to the frantic way I brush my teeth to make sure I’m in bed “on time.”

After reading Corey’s latest blog on Simple Mom about how to find more time during the day, I got angry. I got fed up with my internal time war. I shoved a white flag into the ground and decided to spend my weekend ignoring time.

Why?

I want to know what it feels like to stop worrying about “not having enough time” or “being on time” or doing things at a certain time. I want to really decide what to spend my energy on, without caring about how long it takes. And really, I just want to see what happens. Will my head explode? Will my kids turn into pumpkins?

I’ll admit it won’t be easy. For starters, I’ll have to take down or cover all the clocks in my house – all 10 of them. I’ll have to forgo using my cell phone and computer and Facebook – all things that constantly remind me of time.

Here are some other (scary) thoughts that crossed my mind:

- What about the kids’ bedtimes? I guess we’ll all just go to bed when we feel tired or cranky.

- And mealtime? We’ll eat when we feel hungry.

- And getting all the housework done? Does knowing the time make a difference?

Who knows.

But I can’t wait to find out.

What do you think? Could you spend a day without time? What do you think will happen?

photo by margolove

Find a new Project every weekend at Peace & Projects.

Here in the Midwest, the changing seasons beg for reflection. As autumn leaves begin to swirl, the summer that’s gone becomes defined by a memory of what happened, by the places we saw and the people we met.

This week, I was reminded to reflect while admiring a tree with wild, golden leaves. As I stared, a gust of wind swept the leaves from the branches and dropped them in a pile at the tree’s feet. The change both stunned and fascinated me.

Sometimes, life is like that. Before you get a chance to enjoy the scene, its over and you’re breathless.

Today, reflect on your life; revel in, write about, recall all the wild, golden moments. Here are some things that could be overdue for some reflection:

Summertime. What flavor was your summer? For me: citrus. Remember the warm evenings you savored, the lemonade you sipped. Think back to the experiences, to the events. What left a mark? Store a clue.

Your relationship. The passing seasons can make a relationship old. Keep it vibrant by reflecting on the times when it was springtime. Do this together and share tender moments. Let love bloom.

Your career. Are you doing what you love? Are you in a company that supports what you believe in? If not, be like a gust of wind and sweep fear to the ground. Bundle up and find a place to kindle new ideas. Ask yourself: what do I want to do for the rest of my life? Can you find a way to do it?

Your lifestyle. I’ve let my regular workouts fall by the wayside since last year and its really starting to show. Tonight, all my bluejeans fit awkwardly (or gulp, not at all). Time to find some inspiration and get back on track.

Your place in life. Sooner than later, I’ll be leaving a season called “the twenties.” Where am I going? What’s happened to all my old hopes and dreams? Maybe you’ll find your own thriving in a lush, summer garden. But if you need a rake for this reflection, find one. Work to gather the pieces of your dreams into a big pile.

Now, jump.

.

See also:

Everyone has a chance to be a hit

You don’t need a degree to be a credible expert

photo by jcoterhals

Every Friday is Project Day at Peace & Projects.

Love always gets me.

Specifically, writing about love. I get choked up over my own writing all the time. It leaves me on the brink of tears during copy edit and melts my senses without warning.

There’s something about reading love that makes us all a little weak in the knees. So if its been a week, year or 20 years since the last time you wrote your lover a letter, today is the day to dust off cupid’s pen.

Don’t have a lover? How about writing to one of these people in your life:

- Grandparents

- Kids

- Nieces and nephews

- Best friend

- Secret crush (send or save, its up to you!)

If the idea of a letter is intimidating, try a sentence. Try three words. A Post-It note! Anything that will tell someone how much you love them – it could take 5 seconds or 500.

To begin, turn off distractions like the TV, music and blogs. Reflect on the person and create a mental image of them in a happy moment. Turn this image over and over in your mind until you feel full.

Choose an opening that fits your relationship. “Dear honey buns.” “Hey, hot stuff.” “My darling.”

Next, recall a special memory between the two of you. “I’ll never forget the first day we met…” then embellish with details… “and the way you looked at me from across the room.”

Tell why you’re writing the letter: “Today, I remembered that first feeling of passion between us.”

Then scatter memories like rose petals, drizzle compliments like massage oil. Be specific. Explain what you love about them, or what they did, or how they treat you right. Add hopes and dreams for the future.

Forever yours. Still your sweetheart. Love you more every day.

xoxo

Aw.

Get a FREE love letter kit from thinkmarriage. Go to the site, then scroll down to: Free things from thinkmarriage to send them an email.

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